My sister totally takes advantage of our parents! They have practically raised her 2 children and is so burnt out that they won't keep mine! She has never once offered any compensation! I think she should- they have lives too that have to be put on hold to take care of her kids. People should at least buy gifts or something for them if they won't take money for it.
I think people are wrong for expecting grandparents to take care of their kids.Should couples pay their mothers to babysit their kids?say less than they would pay a regular babysitter?
the occasional gift is a nice idea.but what sort of grandparent would want to be paid.help clean up the mess when u pick the kids up that would be reward enough.signed granny.
As a mom now, I think that when my son gets older and has children of his own, I would not allow him to pay me for child care services. My mom, who watches my son, does charge me for child care services, in her case, I find this unfair because she did not raise me. I was raised by my father and step-mother. My step-mother who has recently retired, has volunteered to keep my son one of the 2 days each week that I need childcare. My mother has complained about this not because she misses my son's company, but because it cuts the amount of money she gets from me in half. Mind you, my mother works full-time, and the flexibility of her full-time job leaves room for her to care for her grandchildren in her home. My step-mother who watches my son, will not allow me to pay her anything for her time. She takes him to swimming classes which she pays for (I have paid for the class several times only to have her come behind me and deposit the money for the classes into my account). She has taken him to story hours, and other places for children to go. For her it is fun and it is time for her to spend with my son doing things that are just them. I have tried to pay her, but the most she will allow me to do is to send food for meals for my son during thr day. (Which she has remedied by going grocery shopping with my son to allow him to pick things for him to eat when he is at her house).
Being a single mom, who works full-time, and is in school full-time, this is such a big help to me. If my real mother were not so motivated by money, I wouldn't have as much of a problem paying her. As it is, my mother charges me $100/week for child care. I could have my son in a licensed childcare center for $135/week, but I do not want him supervised by someone who is not family until he is at least 3 years of age, and thoroughly capable of expressing to me if anything happens to him.
If the grandparents watch the kids, I think they should pay them double what they pay the babysitter. Grand kids run over their grandparents in one way or another at one time or another. I think if the grandparent agrees, then they should get paid well.
It depends on the situation. Most grandparents will babysit for free, because they enjoy spending time with their grandkids. If they live just round the corner and are constantly being asked to babysit and they find this intrusive, they may feel inclined to ask to be paid. My kids are 18 and 20 now and I never paid my mum or mum-in-law to babysit as they lived far away and didn't see us very often.
Ya know, I think this varies by each individual. Many couples rely on their parents to babysit their kids in order to save money. Many grandparents volunteer their time in an effort to have more quality time with their grandkids. However, if you are uncomfortable and feel as though you are taking advantage, provide food for the kid, something to entertain the kid...perhaps treat your mother on occasion like gift certificates for different things such as spa visits, restaurants and such.
I think it is a nice gesture if you pay your mother for babysitting. I used to pay my mother in law for watching my children and she used it as extra money for herself. You need to do what is fair. Some moms don't expect it but surprise them with a $100 bill or two and they appreciate it.
My mom won't take money but she does like to go out to dinner alot so I always buy her gift cards to her favorite restuarants and she really loves it.
I think it would insult some mothers. I guess it depends on the situation. If you use her as a full time babysitter while you work, then absolutely. But is she comes over on occasion while you get a night out then no. That is what a grandparent does, and usually they look forward to spending time with their grand kids, letting them stay up late, eat chocolate for supper, etc.
You should discuss it with your mom first. Ask her what she thinks a fair rate would be and don't let her say she won't accept money because no matter what she says, she will probably wind up resenting you sooner or later and feel taken advantage of. If she absolutely refuses to accept any payment, make sure that you either give her a gift or take her out to a nice dinner say once a month or so to thank her for all she does for you and your children. You might want to make sure that you acknowledge her in some other ways on a weekly basis so that she knows you appreciate what she does for you, or even just tell her how much you love and appreciate her help.
I have often tried to pay my mother to watch my daughter she always takes the money and buys something for my daughter. I do think that you should pay them something how much is completely dependent upon you and the grandparent.
But there is a line between babysitting and raising.
There are several sides to this issue.
Most grandparents would be offended by the thought of being paid to babysit their grandkids. However, the proper and polite thing to do would be to help minimize the financial elements- if the grandparents are expected to feed the children, offering to offset that kind of cost is fair and appropriate. Doing nice things for the grandparents in return (housework, tax help, etc.) is also good.
There are limits however. Most grandparents feel a certain amount of resentment if:
- It happens at the last minute for a non-emergency situation too often
- It goes too late into the night
- It becomes an expectation that they will just automatically do it anytime
It is also important to note that the age, behaviors, and numbers of children make a difference. Grandparents can be easily overwhelmed by the energy created by several kids, older kids, or wilder kids. They may not admit it, but I have seen a lot of situations where the grandparents simply cannot keep up.
My suggestion: If this is a standing date, say every Friday night, or every work day, etc., then a fair payment is only right. I would even go so far as to suggest that the parent gently force the grandparent to take the money.
However, if it is an occasional thing and the parents are careful to respect the grandparent's situations (not too late, not too many kids, etc.), then a gift of a cake or something would probably be more appreciated.
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i love having my grandkids and wouldnt expect anything,alsoi am not old and frail and have more energy than lots of youngsters these days
Yes, and my mother established a savings account for my daughter with the money!!!!
amazing...and you don't have to worry about people abusing your child...or leaving them dirty and in a mess!
I think the parents should at least offer to pay their mother to watch the kids. Most likely the mother would turn them down, they would just enjoy being able to be with their grandchildren. I know when my mom comes over to watch my daughter, especially if I asked her several times in a row, I'll make her dinner or take her out to dinner somewhere. She wouldn't let me pay her, but dinner is always nice. But it's really up to each family how to work out something like that.
old people? You think that all grandparents are elderly?
Regardless of that, no mother should expect a grandparent to babysit at all and if the grandparent does do it for free, that is their decision.
I wouldnt ask to be paid, but if my mom needed the money id offer. If youd feel better then yes ask if its okay to pay.
I whole heartedly agree. They are putting their time and effort into caring for your child. Whether in your home or theirs, compensation for their time and services is the best. Not to mention you get the benefit of a family member caring for your child rather than a stranger. My friend pays her mom $100 a week to watch her 2 kids. I think that is very fair!
Even if I tried, I dont think my mother would ever take money for baby sitting.
Why not 'Pay' her with bringing dinner and flowers along with the kids. That way she can just relax and enjoy them. She will feel appreciated and welcome the treat of having a dinner ready for her.
The couple could do something like offer to buy the mom some groceries in exchange for the babysitting or at least some takeout.
Yes Yes Yes
I would never let my mother babysit my children. But now that my last babysitter is having her baby (in the hospital now, lol), my dad has been babysitting for me while I am at work. He got extremely offended when I offered to pay him.
My GRANDPARENTS, (the kids great grandparents) watched my first son for me for the first four years of his life. I was a single mom, but even if i was married then, they NEVER would have accepted money. In fact, when i insisted that my son go to day care for at least two days a week, they wanted to pay for that. They were in their mid 70's at the time, and they did great!!! It kept them young, busy, and made them sooo happy. Even now they will babysit BOTH my boys sometimes when i have an appointment, and they are 80!!!
Yes you should offer to pay, but i doubt many familes would take that money. Or if they did, i bet they put it back for the kids.
Families that babysit are the best. You can't get better daycare than that!! Well, my son was spoiled to death, but there can be worse things than that!!
You can offer buy most mother won't accept it. So maybe a nice gift would do the trick
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